LISA: But because he believed that about me I wanted to grow into all of that for him. And everybody grows in the really the example of the way they’re loved. And so nobody grows through criticism. People grow through nurture! And so John knew how to nurture certain things in my life that caused me to rise up. And I think too many couples they’re experts in one another’s weaknesses rather than experts in one another’s strengths. I personally thought like
JOHN: Or has the vision
LISA: if I could humble John
JOHN: Or, or
LISA: Pardon?
JOHN: Or has the vision to be able to see where that person can go. You know when you say
LISA: Right.
JOHN: weakness and strength, then that means, that means you might not see that strength right now but you look for the potential in that person to grow into that.
SID: Is that what the scripture means where it says without a vision the people or the marriages perish?
LISA: Absolutely!
SID: And it looks like the institution of marriage is being destroyed in every strata of society. Why?
JOHN: Lisa?
LISA: Okay. Well first and foremost I think this has been a long-term thing. I mean Jesus is talking to His disciples and when you know He had this confrontation with the Pharisees and the Pharisees are trying to find the legal outs for getting you know divorced and then Jesus is talking to His disciples in private and He says hey, you know, listen, you know I’m going to hold you liable to the original plan and they’re like wait a minute, wait, that means we’re stuck! And so I think there’s been a problem about people feeling like they’re stuck and they don’t really understand the purpose of marriage and we haven’t done it well. I mean there’s a lot of marriages right now where people are just not loving one another well. And so they’re either the man is strong and the woman is oppressed or the woman is strong and the man is oppressed. And, and there’s young couples coming up right now that are highly educated, have purpose on their lives and they’re saying we do not want to do marriage the way you’re doing it. It’s too small. It’s too limiting. It’s too oppressive. We want to do it together. And because they’re not seeing people do it well together they’re just saying then we’re just not going to get married. I’m want to be independent. We have some young girls, we have, we have, we have such a collection of amazing young women that work for us and one of them in particular is so independent, so gifted, so talented. She said I am never getting married! I’m not going to have some man squash my life! I’m not going to have them shut down my dreams! I’m not going to have them do that. And then when John and I did this taping she sat in there and she was crying the whole time and she said I’m now going to get married because she found out that marriages are not a power struggle where one person wins and the other one loses. Marriages are a power union. Both people become more of who they were created to be in God than less than.
SID: All right, John
LISA: And we haven’t done this well.
